In the last few weeks a shift has taken place.
A shift in my time.
A shift in my mind.
I’m struggling with how to make all my roles fit together. All the pieces that make up Catherine.
It feels a little bit like trying to make 42 pieces fit into a 24 piece puzzle. No matter how hard I try to make each one of my pieces fit there are always pieces left sitting off to the side. Neglected.
I neglect myself physically or emotionally. I may not nurture friendships or other relationships. My house and all the responsibilities in it gets ignored. I’m not mothering the way I could. My garden needs attention. Evolving Mommy – my space for evolving, connecting and growing – is left untouched. My kitchen is not a hub of activity. The stack of books on my nightstand collects dust. I don’t get enough sleep. I just don’t have the time to make all the pieces fit. At least it feels that way lately.
How do you make all the pieces that matter to you fit in your puzzle?
19 comments
I don’t know how to fit all the pieces together or if you even can. I think its more of a juggling act.
Hope you figure it out. You have been in my thoughts.
Thank you friend. You’ve been in my thoughts also.
Being a little farther down the mom road than you I can say that I haven’t yet figured out how you ever get that whole puzzle together. Things wax and wane and the balance gets out of whack at different periods. I think the fact that you even know where all the pieces are is a major accomplishment
I only *think* I know where all the pieces are, Barb.
If you figure this out, let me know. I’m forever behind.
And I’d say the same to you Shell. Does anyone really have the whole puzzle figured out? I think that is the question to ask. If the answer is yes we should hunt them down and make them spill the magical formula.
I agree that it is a juggling act. I try to keep all the balls in the air but occasionally a ball gets dropped but I pick it up and keep moving on.
I do feel this way a lot though, that there simply is not enough hours in the day. I guess it is all a matter of priorities. Some things will have to get less attention and other things more. For me it is always a work in progress.
We need a long chat soon! Love ya!
Oh Michelle, if only we could all have a few more hours in the day. I would like to think that would solve things but I’m not so sure.
I try to convince myself that the goal isn’t to complete the puzzle but to enjoy working it. I also think that as soon as it seems the puzzle is getting figured out, it gets exchanged for a bigger, more complicated puzzle…that will also never be completed. Coming to terms w/ that is not always easy for me.
It is a breath of fresh air to hear someone talk about this and admit that they are finding it hard to keep it all together.
I have learnt that letting some things slip won’t kill me, if the house is a mess for a day or so its ok. If I dont fit my exercise in that day, its ok etc.
You just have to do as much as you can do and give yourself some slack.
The only answer I’ve managed is to surrender to the idea that you simply can’t fit all the pieces together. There will be some stuff that in a 50 hour day you would want to do (bake cookies for the kids’ class), but has to be dropped bc there are only 24 hours so you buy cookies instead. For me it’s a matter of deciding what is important and what can be let go. Not the best results all the time, but it has allowed me to be content vs always chasing an ideal that I just can’t ever manage to live up to.
A 50 hour day sounds both thrilling and exhausting. I think I’d be glad to have a 28 hour day. Then I would have to let less slide, but you’re right being content is much better than constantly chasing unrealistic ideals.
I hope you figure out how to get all of your pieces together-I’m still trying to figure out how to get it all done every day! Just do what you can-thats all anyone can ask! 🙂
I just read three books that helped me with this soooo much!
I’m working on a blog post about it today.
I hope it helps you. 🙂
I’ll have to check out your post, Connie.
I hear you! I feel like this parenting thing is a constant juggling act. I thought staying home with my kids would help but I think it makes it even trickier because at least at work there is a consistent schedule and balance to my days. I hope you figure something out that works for you!
I hear you sister. I wish I knew the answer.
Wow, Catherine! I know EXACTLY how you’re feeling. I love how you describe it in terms of puzzle pieces, that’s a perfect analogy. I feel like many of the same pieces of my life are being neglected as well. One thing I try not to do is feel guilty. I have to always remind myself of what is really important and if I’m not meeting the needs of something that is truly important, I find a way to fix that and move forward. (Usually easier said than done but it’s a process!)
I agree guilt should be left out of the equation but I’ll be honest it is hard to shake it off sometimes.