Four is hard but not for the reasons you are probably thinking…

Four.

The number four packs a punch. Madeline turned four recently and it hit me harder than previous birthdays. With one, two and three I remember feeling surprise as to how we had reached those ages so soon. I remember feeling a little nostalgia for the past but also a lot of excitement for what one or two or three meant for all of us. New car seats, classes without mom, walking, talking, milk instead of formula.

Four is fun. Four is great. Four is full of new things. Four is just so… old. And while I look forward to all the whole new world of possibilities that four brings for Madeline I can’t help but feel like a tidal wave of independence just engulfed my life.

No more toddler bed. First hair cut. Having a friend sleep-over for the first time. Preschool and Kindergarten around the corner. Swinging by herself. Chores. A brand new booster Seat. Coloring in the lines!

I’m just so not ready for four. Unfortunately it doesn’t really matter if I am ready for four. She is ready for four. I know that Maddy will still need me no matter what age she is. I’m a daughter I know from my own experience that she will still need me even when she is 28 and living her life as an adult. I know that.

Even with knowing she will always need me no matter how mature and independent she gets I’d still like to know one thing. Is there any way to put in a request for things to slow down a bit?